This and That
by Kikino
Summary: "What did they do to you in that place?" That was what she had asked. Zack was hesitant. Of everything that had happened to them, of all he could remember, he didn't want to mention any of it. He decided to say, when he turned to look at her was simply, "Well... this and that..."


**A/N: A drabble of sorts...**

**Rated T for mentions of blood and torture.**

**DISCLAIMER: If I owned, would this really be considered a FANfiction? I make no profit but you have permission to print if you wish it.**

...

**THIS AND THAT**

**Oneshot**

Feathers clouded his dreams. They slowly floated downward in a swaying motion. He never dreamt of the feathers belonging to him—they weren't his to claim. He reaches out and grabs one only for it to shatter in his grasp.

He heard a faint shout but it was so far away he could barely tell what it was. He looked down to the water below. The feathers crowded the water's surface, making it impossible to see his reflection.

As he reached down and plucked a feather from the bunch, he heard a distant shout again. It was louder this time—short and pained. He shot back up to a stand and looked around. There was no one there.

He then returned to picking a feather up from the rippling water. The feather, just s before, shattered in his grasp. He would have thought more into it if a full-out scream hadn't echoed all around. Only this time, he knew where it was coming from: Beneath him. He hurried and picked up one feather in each hand and let them shatter to his touch until he could see his reflection.

Only it wasn't his reflection that he saw. The other moved like a reflection, following his movements but instead of his mako eyes and black hair, he saw frightened blue eyes with spiked blonde hair.

He looked down, confused as to why his friend was there, beneath the water. But, instead of confusion, the reflection was tired... and scared. He smiled reassuringly down at the reflection but the other didn't smile back.

"...Zack..." the other said before the face grimaced in pain.

Then, Zack's dream shattered and he awoke inside his class cage, hearing a loud scream penetrate through the thick glass. The mako bubbled in his sight but he saw through to the operation table in the middle of the room in front of him. And on that table was an infantryman, screaming as the doctors probed at him.

Zack scrunched his face as he concentrated through the mako to get a better understanding. With a heavy pit in his stomach, Zack saw the one and only Hojo amongst the doctors—_scientists_ with a red scalpel in one hand and a long, thin metal rod in the other. Zack's eyes trailed from the hand holding the rod all the way down to the open abdominal cavity of the infantryman.

He could hear the scientists chatter about as they circled the table. "Interesting..." he could barely hear Hojo mutter. "...mutating quickly, but..."

Zack saw a spark come from the hidden end of the rod and the body twitched dramatically as another scream punctured Zack's eardrums.

"Amazing," Zack hear Hojo exclaim but didn't catch any explanation of what made him smile so broadly. That smile made his stomach grow heavier. Zack watched the head scientist pull out the rod, the tip covered in an amazingly dark red that contrasted to that of the scalpel, and placed it on the metallic tray with a clatter before snapping off his bloodied gloves. "Patch him up," Zack heard him say to one of the younger scientists. The scientist said more but Zack couldn't catch it. Instead he just glared as best he could when the older motioned towards him and walked off.

The SOLDIER strained to hear Hojo's conversation with a young lady as they walked out of the room. He could only catch a curse and the mention of SOLDIER. "Such potential.." he heard him complain, as if disappointed. Zack shook his head weakly before turning back to the poor man on the table. The young scientist was just finishing up the patchwork.

Then, after a pass in conversation, another young scientist came over and began to tap something into the keypad of his glass container. A twinge of anxiety ran through Zack when he realized it was his turn on the table. But after seeing the infantryman being helped off the table, he grew courage. If he was on the table, then the other man was not. Suddenly, his body began to ge numb and his mind grew clouded at the serum that was added to his mako. He was about to succumb to the darkness clawing at the edges of his vision until he finally saw the face of the poor infantryman who was now leaning heavily on the man who closed him.

_Cloud?! No! _Zack watched in absolute fear as Cloud was moved from the table to his pod. One arm was wrapped behind the scientist's neck while the other weakly held onto his gut. _No, no, nonono...! _Dread filled Zack's body as Cloud's lowered head lifted at something the scientist said and the two boys locked eyes. Their eyes mirrored shock at the other's presence until sudden rage filled Cloud's eyes. At that moment, Cloud's arm slipped from behind the man's neck. The two fell in a heavy thump as Cloud weakly tackled the other to the ground.

If Zack had the energy he would have jumped at the scene and wince at the loud shout his friend produced when his middle smacked the floor. The gloved hand reached out and grabbed the scientist in a desperate effort to keep him grounded. Zack tried his best to hear what Cloud was saying. When he couldn't, he tried to bang on the glass, shout—anything to support his friend but his body and mind surrendered unwillingly to the darkness.

…

Mako eyes blinked open as Zack awoke from his dreamless slumber only to be greeted by a bright light. Zack shut his eyes again to allow them to adjust before looking around in a grog. He didn't remember how he got to this table but he sure didn't feel good about it.

Memories were beyond him. His last memory was at the ShinRa building but even that was foggy. As he focused to the present he realized a doctor staring at him, the other's nose only inches away from his.

"Who...?" Zack muttered. He tried to say more but the one partial word was tiring enough and his tongue felt heavy. He then remembered he had limbs but for some reason lacked the ability to move them.

The doctor grunted in Zack's face before looking at the other doctors that Zack just noticed were standing around the table. Then with a voice that scratched Zack's ears, the doctor said, "How do you plan on taking notes based off reaction if our subject is too drugged to even twitch?"

"Professor, after the commotion the other sample caused, we found it assuring to double our dosage so we don't get attacked again," said a younger (scientist).

The greasy (professor) quirked a brow. "Attacked?"

"Yes, professor," spoke another as he walked up to the table. "He tacked me down and was able to even strike me. It was all barely en effort, though."

"Fools!" The older professor grimaced at the two. "When did this transpire? Why wasn't I informed?" Just as one of the men was about to speak, the older waved his hand to excuse him. "Bah! I don't want to hear excuses. Go put it on report."

Zack watched one of the younger men nod and walk towards one of the large computers. He wasn't expecting the sudden prick in his arm nor the the burning he felt in his veins immediately afterwards. He slugishly turned his head to look at the long needle embedded in the fold of his right arm and the glowing green fluid that now drained into him. But it was the image beyond that that made his eyes widen:

A young man floating in a tank. He had spiked blonde hair and fair skin. Something about him seemed familiar... His vision began to fade but he stayed fixated on the floating lad. In his trance he could hear voices in the background.

"Did the subject say anything?"

"Yes. It requested of me to release the other subject. It even threatened my life to leave them both alone."

"Interesting... Very interesting! I want you to update his file, record it word for word in great detail. To be so responsive so quickly... Curious. We'll have to keep a special eye on that subject."

"What was the name again?"

"Imbecile. Sample number..."

_No..._ Zack blocked out whatever else he had to say. _His name is... Cloud..._

…

Zack was dreaming again of the liquid plane littered with feathers. His body felt light but his head felt heavy. The water beneath his boots rolled in small waves away from him. Zack looked down after a moment to calm his nerves and try to steady himself.

"...Zack..." he heard Cloud say as he saw his friend on the opposite side of the water. Surprisingly, Zack wasn't surprised to see him there. Zack crouched down, hoping to reach through the floor to touch the blonde but his fingers couldn't break surface. The poor boy was sitting in the fetal position with his arms tightly wrapped around his chest and his head hidden in his knees. "...It hurts..."

Zack frowned as Cloud folded further into himself. He he could comfort his friends; to reach out and touch him. "I know, man," Zack said as he sat down—mirroring Cloud with his knees brought up to his chest and his back to him. He wrapped his arm around his legs, though, pulling them close. "I'll get us out of here," he said with a wan smile down to his companion before looking forward to the vast valley of water and feathers. "I promise."

And he meant it.

He tried to lose himself in the silence but pained whimpers could be heard beneath him. "Angeal..." he whispered as he buried his head in his knees. The guilt made his body suddenly heavy. "What should I do...?"

...

His world was green. Green and constricting. His body felt heavy. So heavy he couldn't move. He needed to scream but no sound came. Not from him anyway.

In his view he saw a poor boy under the knife in an open room. He only screamed once or twice. Not as much as he used to. Zack felt he knew the kid on the table but he couldn't thin much into it before sleeping again.

…

Zack was alone but he felt someone's presence but no matter where he looked he saw no one.

"Cloud?!"

…

Mako eyes looked up warily to look up at duel circles reflecting light.

"Damn you."

Zack glared (tried to, anyway) at the older man, believing it was he who cursed until he noticed the cracked lips did not move.

The scientist did, however, glare back. "This one is becoming quite the nuisance," came that annoying voice he'd found rather familiar. "With the already mutated cells," he started as he leaned back and paced around the table, "the new... as an alien... like a mere flu."

Zack tried to concentrate but no matter how hard he tried that stupid voice persisted to fade out of his ears reach. Though, no matter how faint, the SOLDIER caught the vicious tone in his voice that seemed to grow stronger with each word until he was practically hissing.

"...A new approach."

In his clouded thoughts Zack was just barely able to catch Hojo's—is that his name?—voice. His eyes would have widened at the sight of a scalpel in the man's hand if not for the sudden exhaustion that took his consciousness away from him.

…

Zack sat cross-legged in the water with his arms wrapped tightly around himself as if trying to hold himself together. Even in his dreams his body hurt. He grunted when his fingers touched a tender spot but he only hugged tighter.

"Zack?"

Zack looked for Cloud once he heard the concerned voice. He looked down but only saw his reflection—his true reflection without the paled skin and spiked blonde hair. He was surprised by his disappointment. He looked around for his friend but couldn't see him.

"Cloud?"

"Zack. You okay?"

Looking down again, he saw his reflection with Cloud looming over him. He looked up, behind him—

…

"Cloud..."

His eyes opened, awakened by his own voice. Fear swallowed him when he recognized the narrow tube and the steal table in his view. But it wasn't the surrounding that frightened Zack. Cloud lied on the table surrounded by scientists. The young blonde shuttered a small cry of pain before the oldest of the scientists laughed, his head reared back.

"Amazing! Simply amazing! I'm a genius. Genius!"

Zack wanted to punch that 'genius' square in the mouth. To think he protected him so long ago and what does he do in return? Memories of him undergoing field tests for Hojo came back as well. If only he'd tended to that guard's wish and Hojo might never have found interest in him. Or would that matter at this point? For some reason, he doubted it.

"... Where's Tifa?"

Zack snapped out of his thoughts to see a practically empty room. He didn't remember seeing everyone leave but the only occupant in the room was Cloud on the table.

"Tifa?"

_This is not good._

"Tifa?!" With a heavy groan, Cloud pushed himself off the table and onto the floor which caused another grunt.

Zack banged on the glass as he called out. "Cloud! Run!" The room was empty and Cloud could move. This might be the only chance they got. When the blonde looked to him, Zack motioned to the exit. "Get out of here!"

Cloud saw him but his eyes seemed hazy and his brows furrowed in thought. "Zack..." He gripped the table with on hand as he pulled himself onto shaking legs. "Zack...!" He tried to walk towards his friend but once he let go of the table he collapsed. He looked up from his spot on the floor, eyes desperate. "Zack... What happened? Where's Tifa?!"

Zack was stunned. He didn't know what to say. 'I don't know, Cloud. We kind of left her bleeding in the reactor'? Instead of that, he just shook his head, remaining silent.

Cloud's eyes casted downward, defeated. Zack opened his mouth to say something but the door to the library opening cut him short before he even said a word.

"Not you _again_," the young man groaned as he stomped his way over. Zack recognized him immediately as the man Cloud assaulted. The bruise on his jawbone was completely gone, healed as if it never happened...

"I swear you're more trouble than you're worth," he said as he scooped Cloud up from under his arms. Cloud didn't fight back. He was limp in the man's hands. "If it were up to me you'd be without sedatives during your surgeries."

Zack let out a growl, eying the man as he lifted Cloud up into the pod and started up the mako, letting the limp body float in the bobbling fluid.

"Don't worry," the man said as he looked to the infuriated SOLDIER, "you're next." He then took three steps over to input something or other into the numbered pad on Zack's confinement pod.

"Good," he said in a growl, glaring back at the man. His eyes then hovered over to his left and softened at the sight of Cloud, now unconscious. "Let him rest." It didn't take long until he went numb and closed his eyes in submission.

…

Zack was alone but not completely. He could feel Cloud somewhere. He looked down first but only saw himself looking back at him. He then looked behind him. Nope, nothing. He put his fists on his hips and closed his eyes. Gaia, his chest was burning! Zack tried concentrating on his breathing but even _that_ hurt.

"...Z-Zack...?"

The calling of his name drew his attention and opened his eyes. There, in the distance was Cloud—on the same side! "Cloud!" Zack was so full of sudden energy he couldn't stop himself from running. As he got closer, Zack noticed Cloud was staggering, stumbling over his feet. His friend looked like he'd been through hell. Well... "Cloud!" he yelled again, not losing his stride.

"...ack..."

Then Cloud went top heavy and fell forward into the water. And began to sink.

"Cloud, hold on!" Zack called but the other didn't react. He just kept sinking. "No-no-no-no-no-NO!" Zack reached out but Cloud's body was completely submerged and no matter how hard he tried, he couldn't penetrate the water's surface.

Cloud's body kept sinking farther and farther down beyond light's reach until he was no longer seen.

"Damn it!" Zack punched the surface, letting droplets of water splash up his arm. He stayed crouched on his knees with his head resting on the water as he feebly clawed at the water. "Dammit..."

…

The next time Zack saw Coud was on the steel table but he wasn't moving. Not even a twitch. It was as if he was nothing but an empty puppet now...

…

"You can't do this to me!"

"It's already been done. Now off to your duties."

"Hojo! Hojo!"

…

"Oh wow, look at that, everything's the same as usual. Who saw _that_ coming? I sure didn't."

...

"Can you believe this? To think after all this time I'd speak to you so casually... it's a shocking realization."

Zack was able to open his eyes this time and see a young man tending to the number pad to his containment pod. He immediately recognized the young man as the guy Cloud had attacked. His hair was notably longer than Zack could recall.

"Honestly, I don't understand why Professor Hojo doesn't just pull the plug on you two," he said as he walked to the other pod. "I'm sick of this place and these clones. I just want to go home but no-oo, I'm stuck here watching over you two. Hojo has already given up on you."

Zack watched with a glare as the young man attempted to melt Cloud with un-acquired heat vision. He finally stopped back and seemed to head towards the library.

…

"I can't believe her! Calling me up like that! I explain, explain, explain, and all she does is _nag!_" He shook his head. "Honestly! She just doesn't understand my duties. I mean, there was a time when I would rush home after work. It wouldn't be too hard these days but that woman just—" He sighed and stood up from his chair, snapping his book shut.

…

_BANG!_

"...stupid, senile, old lunatic of a man!"

He was throwing books now. Grabbing them by the armful and hurling them off the bookshelf. "This is not what I signed up for!"

_BANG!_

Zack was too tired to flinch when a book bounced off the front of his pod with a _BANG!_

…

The books were back in their places, all nice and neat except for a few strays on the ground. The man was currently sitting on the operation table with his arms crossed, a scowl on his face.

"...and she blames _me_? After she practically forces me to sleep on these dirty floors!"

…

He was smiling today. And whistling. He didn't glare at Cloud for the first time while pressing familiar keys on his tank.

…

"At first I felt guilty. She didn't move much but she was warm. And _quiet_! So much better than that wench." He spit the last word.

…

"...so freaky but now I don't know how I lived here without her. And she's just a clone..."

…

_DUNK! DUNK! DUNK!_

Zack didn't see him at first. He was groggy and had difficulty keeping his eyes open but somehow managed to look over to Cloud where he saw the man punching and kicking at Cloud's tank. His hair was much shorter than he last saw him and his face clean of facial hair but glowing red.

"It's all your fault! ALL YOUR FAULT! She'd still be here—! If you had died I wouldn't be here and she wouldn't have left! I should kill you!"

Zack felt a sudden surge of adrenaline that allowed him to clench his fist. _Don't you touch him. If you hurt him _any_ more, I'll break through this—don't care how—and I'll kill you._

Miraculously, Zack stayed awake until the man cooled down enough to stomp out of the room. After watching him leave, Zack looked back over to Cloud. He hadn't reacted at all. Not even a flinch. Cloud just stared blankly, not showing any sing of him formal self. Cloud was gone—drowned in mako and despair.

…

Zack was alone again. Completely alone with only a clear reflection and the sky above. There was no sign or reminder of any other life force. Cloud was gone. Zack didn't know what to do.

He looked across the horizon for anything but not even a single feather remained on the water's surface. Zack really _was_ alone. Even traces of Angeal were gone—leaving Zack with only his core. He couldn't smile anymore—there was nothing to smile at. If he couldn't save Cloud, who could he save? He couldn't even save himself.

He stared down at his own reflection, not recognizing the version of him staring back. All hope was lost—all was left was despair. The ground beneath him felt soft and he could feel himself being down under so he could drown.

A voice called out to him from above—causing him to stand up straight on solid ground just as quickly as he had been sinking. He couldn't recognize the voice at first—it felt unworldly and somehow smelt of flowers. But when he looked up he saw only a strong feather fluttering down until it finally rippled the water. He looked up, trying to find the source but saw only empty sky. "Those wings," he said, voice soft. "I want them too."

In that realization, portions of himself started to return in a painful way. He remembered his friends, his family, Aerith, Angeal, Cloud, and his promises to all of them. He couldn't give up here—there were still things he needed to do. The realization and resolve struck him so hard he could feel his world shatter around him.

**To be continued in Final Fantasy VII: Crisis Core**

**A/N: My first drabble. I guess it's too long to really be considered a drabble but I refuse to call it something else. This is my first and probably last FFVII fic. I respect it so much that I dare not insult the media with my inability to write these characters. I've had this lying under dormant for about a year now so I had to blow the dust off. I hope it's at least acceptable. Please inform me of any mistakes whether it be typos or storyline flaws. It'd be greatly appreciated. Thanks for reading!**

**Ta-ma ai-ma-sho!**

**Kikino**


End file.
